9/19/2012

You got knocked the fuck out. Well, almost

     The LAST thing I would want is for you people to think that Im nothing but a hoodrat. BUT this one might go along with everything yall already think of me. Just know I am a good, caring person. I try my hardest to be as loyal as possible, and in return I expect the same. OH and Im just frickin awesome.

     Now with that being said, lets start this shit. Iight, sooooo its a normal UMD ( a college in Mass) Thursday night. EVERY single Thursday that me and my fran Clap are out there we are DRUNK ASS BITCHES, MEAT BALL WASTED, intoxicated beyond belief. BUT this one night was different. We sat around, sipped a LITTLE, talked about jesus and religion for madddd long. YES i said jesus, and sippin in the same sentence. We always fuckin do that, we'll get into our deepest convos while slow sipping the devils piss. But back to the story. We hear of a party so we're like fuck it lets ride out. Mind you, WE ARE SOBER. We have alcohol in our system, but I know when im drunk and when im sober. I was sober Sally and Clap was sober Stacey. I knew I was sober just because it was a tad bit nippy outside, drunk people dont remember shit nor do they feel the coldness of the wind blowing.

     We get to the party, and everyone is wack. WACK, like fuckinggggg wack. You got the white loose woman to the left playin beer pong with white boys and the token black dudes. You got the fine lil sophomore boys in the corner looking oh so good with their young asses. You got a few black girls in the corner mean mugging. I just felt mad wack being there, it just wasn't the type of vibe I liked being in. But whatever, me and Clap were gonna turn the fuck up. Wack or not, sober and all.

     We start off just talkin to some random ass black kid who somewhat resembled a cousin of mine (who also goes to that school) the kid was so fucking weird, but we were bored so we kept talkin to him. Now we're being semi loud, but come on we're at a party why the fuck would we be quiet? This aint church nigga. We throw our twitter names around, were joking laughing, dancing. People are fucking with us hard cus shit who wouldnt? We're cool, decent looking girls that really just wanted to have fun.

     I hope you're paying attention by now. Some shit popped off involving some people that I wont talk about cus its basically irrelevant. BUT lets just say I go outside for air. Im outside inhaling the sweet toxins of underage drinkers n shit. OH AND BY THE WAY WERE STILL FUCKIN SOBER. The whole point of this is coming next....... Duh duh duhhhhhduh

     Clap grabs the door knob and says "lets go spank, were goin back in the party" so I look at her, like nah bitch I aint ready. It was packed, sweaty and wack. Lemme breathe b. She opens the door now, and is trying to make me go in but i really just wanted to be outside. Out the cut some BIG black fucking donkey kong ass nigga comes out the wood works and says "CLOSE THE FUCKING DOOR".... Now for those of you that dont know Clap, she is full blooded puerto rican but that chick can get really muthafucking ghetto, and quick. She looks this 6'11 348lbs ass nigga in his eyes and shes like "NIGGA FUCK YOU, I AINT CLOSING SHIT ...YOU KNOW WHO THE FUCK I AM?!" By now im like man, claps hoodrat ass can never just shut up. Im probably like 6 feet away, just watching cus clap is standing her ground, even tho donkey kong really looked like he wanted to bite her head off. 2 random boys get in between the two because Donkey kong kept saying"imma fuck this bitch up" and quite frankly he wasnt joking.

     NOW everyone knows, as soon as someone gets inbetween a fight, a punch is soon to be thrown. Thats just the way shit goes. All i see is a BIGGGG BLACKKK hand going towards my frans face. Now clap aint no bitch, but I felt like a momma cheetah tryna protect her babies... I intercept that damn hand and punch this big Shaquille o'neal nigga square in the cheek. I felt like a power ranger man, i jumped into it and all. I looked up and knew i done fucked upppppppp, now his gorilla hand was heading towards my face.

     Ahhhhhhh fuck. He mushed the shit outta me.. aint gonna lie, my face got pushed the fuck back and as soon as i look up im like "ohhh no this nigga did not".. But while i look up, BOOM clap punches this nigga in his face. LMFAOOOO man i smiled on the inside. Clap is really for that life, with her puerto rican ass... So NOW people wanna drag him in the house, NOW they wanna stop this shit. Oh nah shit was too late now. Being the hoodrats we are, were worked THE FUCK UP!! y'all aint stopping shit now....

     Ok, so this part makes me giggle everytime. Some 5'7 stocky black nigga comes running outside like a mad man. You can tell hes a football player, but for some sick reason i thought i could take him. Ask me why im thinking i can fight a man, idk what the fuck be going through my thick ass skull sometimes. So this dude is cussing, so im cussing back on my YOLO i aint everrr scared (in my best bone crusher voice) shit.. This nigga looks me dead in my eyes, and squares up...

     OH my fucking baby jesus my heart dropped, this was a two weeks before my birthday so i was crying inside like "man imma have a black eye for my 21st, how am i gonna cover this shit, WTF im blaming clap for all this, i aint rolling with her nowhere ever again" .. Even with all them thoughts, i still squared up. Spank aint a sucka, she may be a dumb fucking bitch but she aint a sucka. So were squaring up, im prayin my inner Muhammad Ali comes out or one of these MUTHAFUCKERS that are watching jumps in. Oh no, I literally see it in his eyes that hes bouta knock me out til some time tomorrow evening, Clap comes out the cut and punches this dude in the face BOOM. LMFAO another moment that I just laughed on the inside.

     He turns to her, and pushes the shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit out of her. Poor girl fell and all. Arms out, straight on her back, YOU HAD TO HAVE BEEN THERE. Shit was slow motion. Now its my time to attack, I do a slick ass move kinda like the Michael jackson spin on crack and punch the nigga in his face BOOM, he pushes the black off of me. But my stance is so mean that i just kinda sorta stumbled (he must really suck at football).. Clap goes in again for one last punch.. This chick got heart I tell ya, but the nigga pushes her again. Oh but NOW niggas wanna tackle him and walk him away like he just fought a bunch of niggas. NOWWWW they wanna stop this shit, after they got their entertainment in for the night..

     All that, and I remember it ALL, I remember my heart beating as fast as a 13 year old kids hand the first time he beats off. Mannnnn how the fuck do i explain this to my kids? MY mommy fought two boys, got jumped by messicans and quit her job on the first day in a recession. Smh, im such a horrible role model b. OH and by the way, this will be my LAST blog entry about fighting though, im all about peace, and being positive. Well not really, but im trying to be. So I hope you enjoyed the ratchetness while it lasted

9/17/2012

Proud Family

 
      OKKKK so back in the day, high school days I was a BAD… like the little bad black girl that wouldn't listen to anyone, that was me…I wanted to be a rebel without a cause SOOOOO bad... No one could tell me anything. I would steal, fight, use to get kicked out of my house all the time, I just didn't give a fuck… now looking back at it, i was a dumb little bitch, and ME today would probably slap teenage spank… she was aggy… but anyway… clearly I've grown n learned how to act.. but shit wasn't always this simple.. i had to learn the ways of life at a young age.. not really the ways of life, that just sounded cool….. but high school wasn't that simple for me.. i always felt like i had to prove myself for whatever reason.. and i usually did just that, proved myself..

     So this one very hot day, some chick hit me on my two way (yes my nextel.. cus back in the day those bitches was popppinnnnngg) BLEEP BLEEP (yup and thats exactly how it sounded when someone would hit your 2 way)…. and for some sick reason she was talking REAL CRAZY.. Now anyone that knows me, KNOWS i can argue and yell and fuss and scream all day…. but, i can not handle when someone yells at me. lord knows i can't…. so just don't do it… but anyway words were said back and forth, and they weren't nice…... At this time im 14, the girl who hit me up was at least 17, possibly even 18... idk she's always been pretty irrelevant in my life  but yeah….. but i skipped over a few parts, she was hollering and cussing over some shit that happened between her and my older male cousin and myself a few weeks back (my cousin just recently got locked up but a few weeks before that he had me answer his two way and tell whoever had hit him up to stop being on his dick and hitting his line… that girl happened to be this little ho screaming her lungs out…) soooooo…..This bitch tells me to go to her house, cus she clearly was feeling froggy on this hot summer evening……   so thats exactly what I did.. Hopped on my bike ( cus like i said i was 14) i got on that bitch ALONE and went to her damn crib…..Now I'm a little smarter, but at the time… i did not care, clearly….  So I pull up and its her with MADDDDDD niggas. Black people everywhere, I didnt give a fuck though……. only thing I cared about was making sure I didn't get jumped (my biggest fear, and the whole point of this damn blog entry)... whatever, so I throw the first punch, end up beating the bitch downnnnn… like to the point where people thought i had rings on cus her face was so fucked up,.. oh the good ol' days. JUST KIDDING. but anyway, fast forward a good two years and this is where the story begins……….

     NOW here comes the main point of this whole post….. I WAS cool with these Puerto Rican girls who kind of resemble the gross sisters from proud family… These chick were suppose to be born men, i swear to baby jesus. They were like 5'9 and solid 200 pounds in high school b. IN HIGH SCHOOL. I'm a good 5'3ish, weighing no more than 115lbs.. i didn't grow tip my senior year which is real aggy….. but at one point in time, me and these girls were cool… real cool, i was even in one of their sweet 15 THAT COOL... but then had a falling out.  And let me tell you, these girls are pure bullies though.. always have been. They'll get a group of friends and somehow end up being mean to them, beating them up… spreading rumors about them, everything. and i just so happen to be one of the many that this happened to…… But unlike every other girl that they cut off, i didn't give a fuck… Ive alway stood on my own anyway, so i never felt the need to follow anyone.. especially these manly muthafuckas……… I guess they thought I was suppose to bow down to them and worship the ground they walked on, even after they talked so much shit about me…... PSTTTT little did they know. They would talk their shit, and my little ass would come back just as hard with the shit talking.. Cus like i said, i can do this arguing shit…

     So we had thanksgiving break, which last like a week…. and during that time, the gross sisters and  happened to exchange some words over the two way ( that damn 2 way got me into a lot shit now that i look back at it) They talked their shit, you know I talked my shit …. WHATEVER…So, we get back to school.. fresh off of break and were in breakfast now (everyone would go to breakfast, even if you didn't eat.. it was your way of seeing your people that you didn't have classes or lunch with) and I'm dressed like a hood rat cus YOUNG spank thought she was a little boy…. MY fro was out, i had sweat pants on, a BIG ass sweater and some jordans.. I obviously wasn't the best dressed in school but i was always comfy so fuck you.. But yeah, I see them, they see me... We do a little mean muggin and that's all. NOW i know these hoes got balls because I've seen and heard of them do a lot of shit….. but I just assumed if shit was gonna pop off, it was gonna be after school.. cus lord knows don't nobody got time to be getting suspended for 10 days, my mother would go ape shit…. So,  one of them called me over to their table…… I stand up and walk over there, alone….. on my tupac THUG LIFE shit, standing tall, well trying to at least….... She goes in the deepest, ugliest, no type of sex appeal in her voice, spanish accent "ayo you tell people shes fucking her bruddah?"…...so ME being ME, aint shit spank….. I quickly and proudly answer with "YEAH"……... (it was actually her step brother, but still. thats gross.. don't call someone your blood brother when y'all are having sex and living under the same roof and calling the same woman mother, thats creepy bruh)….. i exposed them bitches and WOOOO lets just say the gross sisters were not happy with little ol' me…… she then goes, in her wack ass accent "we gon fuck you up after school, SWEAR TO GOD"…. So now I'm like bet, we're beefing after school, Imma have to call my mother and tell her Im staying after. I got this.. Gonna tell my cousins to come up here, make sure i don't get jumped. IM good… idk which one I'm gonna fight, but whoever it is… she bout to get this work…..

     So i turn around, talking shit in my head like "Fuck these spics, they aint bout shit" and i start walking back towards my table….. ME being the dumb fuckin teenager thinking Im SOOOOO untouchable, i look down and see that my shoe is untied…. at this very moment I'm a step away from my table so i bend down and tie my shoe. SMH one of my biggest mistakes in life thus far…... These damn spics done attacked my ass from the back (no homo) like I was one of the last Daddy Yankee cd.s on earth.... By this time I basically blacked out, so i can't tell you step by step what happen (sorry, i black out every time i fight.. idk if its cus of my aderenrlin or because I'm literally CRAZY) but i was TOLD I was fighting like 8 of these broads… YUP the whole damn crew wanted a piece of me…. LMFAO BRUH WHYYYYYYYY…. Eventually with all the chaos going on two of my girls jumped in, shit was like a fucking WWE cage match….... I remember getting punched from the back from the front, from the side, all while tryna focus my swings on this ONE rican. I didnt care that everybody was at me, I honestly didn't feel any of it, thank god...... but this bitch that i ended u face to face with was basically the ring leader so it ended with me and her squaring up…...
  
     5 minutes in the damn fight teachers come and break it up, their holding her big ass I guess them thinking I was a victim, which i was :(......  so while theyre doing and my shit ass, makes sure to get my last hits in.. and IDC if it was a sucka move or not, this bitch was gonna leave this school knowing i wasn't the one… so BOOM i punch the chick in her face like 3 times. I was so proud of myself man, i laughed inside... I still laugh thinking about it. I done got jumped by 8 spics..  Their dad sold coronas out their house PURE SPICS. I got escorted to the office cus clearly I'm such a big threat, first thing i did was looked in a mirror…. LORD, if they ruined my face just know i am gonna be a statistic and i will be going to jail for murder, quote me on this god cus i am not playing… I looked in the mirror, and saw a very thin, very light scratch under my eye.. BITCH WHAT……… HUH? I'm lost right now. Did i or did i not just get jumped? Am i being punk'd? Is this a sick dream? Nope… it was real… and these weak big for nothing bitches barely left a mark on me *inserts painted nails emoji* but…...I ended up still getting suspended for that fight, I WAS BEYOND HOT. Like yall gon let me get jumped by these spics, not show up to help til we done already had a royal rumble, and THEN tell me i can't come back to school for 5 days? WHAT TYPE OF WORLD DO WE LIVE IN? IM THE VICTIM HERE BUDDY!!!!!!!! They said it was because "I fought back" man, white people dont make no damn sense. That one fight right there ended up being one of the biggest fights in Taunton High history, not saying I'm proud of it, but i can say it was pretty entertaining…..Those girls that i fought eventually ended up going to jail for attempted murder, so yeah… lets just say I'm thankful to be alive today.. but still fuck them, just fuck them